When Gods come knocking
I found this post difficult to write, because I have a hard time discussing the gods in a serious manner. I'm not sure why. I think it's because they simply don't translate well to text. Whatever I say, it diminishes the experience. If I could speak in poetry I might get closer, but my nature is not very poetic.
This is also a very personal essay. For most of my life, I would pray at night that I would be shown how best to serve. Even after I'd started work on FlameKeeping, which is what I was absolutely called (pushed, prodded, nagged) into doing, I'd still ask. Because I just couldn't see that I was doing what I was called to do. I finally, about a month ago, realized that I was serving and that I was doing what I should be doing. It might not be everything I should do, but it is the primary calling. And I'm honored to do it.
Questions:
What does being called mean to me? That I've got the skills and abilities to handle something. This doesn't mean that other people aren't called to the same thing and they didn't hear it, or they hear it differently. I absolutely don't believe I'm the only person to be called to start FlameKeeping. I'm just the only person I know of that heard and came up with this. That doesn't mean other people weren't called. It just means they went a different way or didn't have the abilities needed to put it together. (or they're putting it together somewhere else, and I've simply never seen it. They may be doing a better job).
If I could be called by any god. hrm. I don't think I would have picked Apollo, although I can understand why He picked me. I wanted to be picked by Athena for a long time, because She struck me as an ideal. I wanted to be a warrior, to be wise, to be unconnected. It's not what I needed, though, and it's not who I am. I am nurturer, writer, one who brings things together. I'm not a warrior, although I do admire those who can do that. I'm not one.
Would I rather be called to a task or choose one? There's a certain comfort in being called to one, because then I know I'm doing the "right thing". I've always had a problem with self-confidence. However, I think there's also a certain joy in doing what you know you want to do as well. There's no reason one can't both choose one and be called for another, either. But there is security in a call, especially a call that will never be *finished*. I know what it is I am to do. It's not why I was born, I don't believe in that. But since I'm here, it's what I should do.
This is also a very personal essay. For most of my life, I would pray at night that I would be shown how best to serve. Even after I'd started work on FlameKeeping, which is what I was absolutely called (pushed, prodded, nagged) into doing, I'd still ask. Because I just couldn't see that I was doing what I was called to do. I finally, about a month ago, realized that I was serving and that I was doing what I should be doing. It might not be everything I should do, but it is the primary calling. And I'm honored to do it.
Questions:
What does being called mean to me? That I've got the skills and abilities to handle something. This doesn't mean that other people aren't called to the same thing and they didn't hear it, or they hear it differently. I absolutely don't believe I'm the only person to be called to start FlameKeeping. I'm just the only person I know of that heard and came up with this. That doesn't mean other people weren't called. It just means they went a different way or didn't have the abilities needed to put it together. (or they're putting it together somewhere else, and I've simply never seen it. They may be doing a better job).
If I could be called by any god. hrm. I don't think I would have picked Apollo, although I can understand why He picked me. I wanted to be picked by Athena for a long time, because She struck me as an ideal. I wanted to be a warrior, to be wise, to be unconnected. It's not what I needed, though, and it's not who I am. I am nurturer, writer, one who brings things together. I'm not a warrior, although I do admire those who can do that. I'm not one.
Would I rather be called to a task or choose one? There's a certain comfort in being called to one, because then I know I'm doing the "right thing". I've always had a problem with self-confidence. However, I think there's also a certain joy in doing what you know you want to do as well. There's no reason one can't both choose one and be called for another, either. But there is security in a call, especially a call that will never be *finished*. I know what it is I am to do. It's not why I was born, I don't believe in that. But since I'm here, it's what I should do.
posted by Vieva | 9:27 AM
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