Living in Time
I don't believe that we create our own reality. If we did, I would be a lot healthier (and just a touch thinner .. I've got my vanity too!). What we create is possibilities.
I think this is an important point (that we create possibilities, not reality) because when we believe we create reality, we ignore the realities of the people around us and the world we live in. "I create my own reality" can lead to horrible narcissism. It leads to the belief that people are poor through some kind of insane "choice" and that riches come through positive thinking instead of work. What we have are possibilities. I can choose to work for health, to work for wealth, to work for people around me. And I can't choose everything, either: there are only so many hours in a day, and I have to make tradeoffs. Right now, most of my choices are fairly small-scale - my son and husband, my writing, my religious work. I know I should do more out of the house, but I just don't have the time and the energy to add more to my workload.
Questions!
How do I create my future? Well, I got married and had a baby .. that defines the next twenty years or so pretty clearly for at least a good chunk of my life. Whatever else I do, I will also be a mother. That's a clear choice. I also work on my writing .. if I want to be a published author, the only way to get there is my butt in the chair and my hands on the keyboard. If I don't do the work, I'll never get the reward.
What cycles am I in? Well, the great cycle of life .. I have become a parent and perpetuated myself upon the world. That's the biggest cycle. And then there are the daily ones of things like housework .. I eat, I dirty dishes, I clean them, I cook in them, I eat. I have a monthly writing group I meet with. I chat with my friends most weekdays. My husband works during the week, which also affects my time and cycles. Most of these cycles, I've chosen. I certainly chose wife, mother and author, and everything else seems to come from them.
How am I an individual? Well, I'm the only me there is. (thank goodness!) I'm also part of a greater whole .. I may be the only mother of MY son, but there are many mothers and many sons out there. I am the only person writing THIS book, but many people write books. It is when I forget that there are other mothers (or that my husband is also a parent, and that father is as meaningful as mother) that things get confused. I am equal with other people. The difference is in how I choose to interact with others, not that they exist.
I think this is an important point (that we create possibilities, not reality) because when we believe we create reality, we ignore the realities of the people around us and the world we live in. "I create my own reality" can lead to horrible narcissism. It leads to the belief that people are poor through some kind of insane "choice" and that riches come through positive thinking instead of work. What we have are possibilities. I can choose to work for health, to work for wealth, to work for people around me. And I can't choose everything, either: there are only so many hours in a day, and I have to make tradeoffs. Right now, most of my choices are fairly small-scale - my son and husband, my writing, my religious work. I know I should do more out of the house, but I just don't have the time and the energy to add more to my workload.
Questions!
How do I create my future? Well, I got married and had a baby .. that defines the next twenty years or so pretty clearly for at least a good chunk of my life. Whatever else I do, I will also be a mother. That's a clear choice. I also work on my writing .. if I want to be a published author, the only way to get there is my butt in the chair and my hands on the keyboard. If I don't do the work, I'll never get the reward.
What cycles am I in? Well, the great cycle of life .. I have become a parent and perpetuated myself upon the world. That's the biggest cycle. And then there are the daily ones of things like housework .. I eat, I dirty dishes, I clean them, I cook in them, I eat. I have a monthly writing group I meet with. I chat with my friends most weekdays. My husband works during the week, which also affects my time and cycles. Most of these cycles, I've chosen. I certainly chose wife, mother and author, and everything else seems to come from them.
How am I an individual? Well, I'm the only me there is. (thank goodness!) I'm also part of a greater whole .. I may be the only mother of MY son, but there are many mothers and many sons out there. I am the only person writing THIS book, but many people write books. It is when I forget that there are other mothers (or that my husband is also a parent, and that father is as meaningful as mother) that things get confused. I am equal with other people. The difference is in how I choose to interact with others, not that they exist.
posted by Vieva | 10:18 AM
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